Thursday, August 27, 2009

Do Vegan Cows Give Brown Moo Juice?

College is killing my carnivore buzz. Teddy Bear started back to school and she is taking a nutrition class...and the teacher is a vegan. Now we have brown milk in the fridge. I've heard of moo juice. but poo juice? She says its soy milk but it tastes like nothing. She poured it on little pieces of cardboard and plywood. I know, I know, it was cereal, but it still didn't taste any better with the poo juice on it. I probably should learn to like it because I am lactose intolerant. Can you imagine not being able to buy Baskin Robbins 31 flavor ice creams? Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey...or whatever its called because you will be a writhing lactose emitting alien within 30 minutes?

BFF and I once went to a scrapbook convention (hey, I saw that eye roll! Knock it off) and they were giving away Skinny Cow non-dairy ice cream treats. Yummy! I can eat those, right? Right? No, no, I can't. I ended up LYING down in the lobby of the convention center wondering which was worse? Farting in public or trying to walk bent over to the bathroom and farting in a stall? Luckily, that feeling passed.

Teddy Bear loves her nutrition class and actually bought a book called "Skinny Bitch." I guess it's a vegan cookbook. TB was making a grocery list out of this book. Like it's hard to remember if its green, it's keen. She knows how I feel about the whole subject but she said they have a vegan sloppy joe? Both Killdozer and I look at her like she has eaten a magic mushroom. How do you make a VEGAN sloppy joe? With tofu, of course.

It's going to be a tough semester...


@eloh said...

Do vegans eat jello? Do any type of "vegetarians" eat jello? I saw and little program of the History Channel today...quite the eye opener. 41,000 cows (bones there of) used in every batch that comes out of the Eastman factory, used in making film, pharmaceuticals, golf balls and of course, food.

Anonymous said...

If their food is so good why do they do everything they can to make it taste like my food?

silliness I say!

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Good luck with that.

And, for the first commenter: No, vegans and vegetarians don't eat Jell-O or any gelatin products.

I had a girlfriend (for a very short time) that was a vegetarian and wanted me to convert. She was crazy hot, though: hot and crazy.

Daddy Papersurfer said...

Somehow the thought of people farting all over the world is strangely reassuring ....... oh dear

Aunt Juicebox said...

My daughter won't eat jello, or gummi bears or use certain brands of freaking toothpaste. Cripes, it's a nightmare. Nip it in the bud now if you can. LOL

I think soy milk tastes ok, but you can be allergic to soy the same as milk. But veggie bacon? NOT the same.

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

@eloh...I asked my daughter about jello and you are so right, but for some reason she says she is not going to stop eating jello. She practices vegeterianism the way some people practice religion...pick and choose!

@mjenks...Why oh why are those foofy stores so expensive? They wanted nearly $4 for a can of soup. Cheaper to cook at home thank you very much.

@Daddy Papersurfer...It's true isn't it though? It's kinda like imagining everyone naked...oh dear. Thanks for stopping by...I love your blog.

@aunt juicebox...Thank goodness my daughter loves too many things that are verboten~! I can be allergic to soy milk, too! Yes, you made my day. I cannot believe there is really something out there called a tofurkey or some such nonsense! Just spend $56 on "healthy stuff." We'll see. *sigh*