Wednesday, September 2, 2009

I'm So Smart...Let's Do Some Math

Shel Silverstein. Genius. Mom. Dunderhead.

One 19 year old.

One 51 year old.

Take away the 19 year old. Much better.

I work ten to twelve hour days I'm so dumb. Daughter asks me last night why I'm so tired, I don't do anything but sit all day long. Yes. She's right.

Can I turn in one daughter and get back two puppies maybe? There has got to be a mathematical equation for putting a kid in her place. No credit card for gas? She can see how much gas costs as she subtracts it from her check book?

I don't work hard. How hard can it be to listen to someone talk and then transcribe into a document? I mean, any moron could do it, right?

I listen to highly paid educated physicians all day long as they talk into my headset about your medical history. Well, not yours, but somebody's medical history out there. I listen to them yawn, mumble, ramble, chew, eat, and yes, pass gas once in a while. I listen intently so I can get every word he says. I research every new term I hear because I hate getting stuck on a word. I mean I really hate it. I used to have a black belt in anatomy. New brain words are like crack for me. The sylvian fissure? Gyrus? Sulci? Corpus callosum? Yes. I am jonesing as I write.

I do transcription for two neurosurgeons, two general surgeons, pulmonary and sleep medicine, pain management and interventional pain management physician, physical therapist, and I have done urology, family practice, ENT and facial plastics, dermatopathologist.

I have done a lot of doctors.

I am just that kind of a girl.

You have to be curious and slightly relentless to be good at what I do and you have to be somewhat of a computer nerd. If right clicking is an alien concept, probably not your kind of job because you have to set up VPNs, split tunnels, specialized programs. Yes. I love what I do most of the time.

But I don't work hard. Nah. Using your brain is not hard work. Do you hear that out there? All you people going to school. Don't bother.

Doesn't Shel Silverstein have a poem about a brother trying to sell his little sister? Is it too late to get Teddy Bear a big brother?


Amy said...

I did transcription for awhile (not medical) and it was tough. The toughest part for me was trying not to correct the grammar as I typed. Ugh. And, hey...if you're going to do someone, it might as well be a doctor.

Love Shel S. too. He floats my boat.

Bill Stankus said...

Only 19? You're slightly halfway to freedom and sanity.

Anonymous said...

the bride does transcription!

lol@ swap for 2 puppies! Tff.

The Sagittarian said...

It's the concentration that makes you tired I reckon. Take 2 bottles of champers and call me in the morning!

Anonymous said...

I admire what you do soooo much. Watching Chloe learn those words about did me in. I am utterly clueless. But the problem is looking for admiration from our kids. We will be forever "Dah Mom" but if it helps I sure admire you! Cute post Karen~

@eloh said...

I'm in, if you find a way to make the trade, I have a 25 yr old son...famous poster child for Planned Parenthood.....well, he could be.

I like puppies.

The Good Cook said...

What you say? Using your brain, your actual brain, is somehow tiring???

I have never been so tired as when I have been mentally tired.

BTW - the videos? Very nice touch!!

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

@amy...I had a client once who spoke incredibly good English but his first language was Korean, so his grammar was spotty at best. On that account, I was free to fix all kinds of stuff and just flagged the big stuff. He dictated a letter of medical necessity once and when he got it back, he looked at me, looked at the letter, and then said, "I know I don't sound this good. Thanks." hee, hee.

@bill...only half way! Criminy. I need a drink.

@sage...Your bride does transcription! Dang, have that girl email me and we can commiserate. I am rapidly becoming a doggie lover instead of a dog tolerater. Doggies don't say I will, I will and then never do whatever you have asked them to do.

@sagittarian...Unfortunately, champagne and I don't mix, but Jack (Daniels that is) and I have a great relationship. Concentrating IS hard work. The next time my daughter is studying I will have to remind it that it's not hard work. ha. nice to hear from you again! Chloe is so awesome~! Give her a big hug for me.

@eloh...I have a 25 year old, too, daughter though. Why oh why do they make you crazy? Pay back is a bitch I guess. I am thinking seriously getting a doggie all for me. No fat weiner dogs or butterfly eared dogs that bark incessantly for me...nope I want a moose. I am beginning to like doggies.

@good cook...mental work is so draining and especially starting my new client and learning new routines. Yikes. And I have so much fun looking for the perfect video...I am a YouTube fanatic~! Send any good ones my way...they will probably end up in my blog!

Bill Stankus said...

PS. Actually it gets more complex and possibly worse, mine are 25 and 30 and in truth there's never really an empty nest or total separation. Your thoughts about it all linger forever.

But what I really wanted to say ... thanks for an awesome comment on my Bus Trip story. I plan on writing more of it in the next few days, hope it lives up to your expectations. Thanks again, I needed that.

KC said...

Swapping sounds like a viable option. By the way, I left you a little something over at my place so come on over.

Lola Lakely said...

God I could never do what you do! It certainly sounds tiring to me.

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

@kc....thanks~! Swapping would be good but I'm sure no one will take me up on the offer. Poor puppies.

@lola...I love your blog! I bet you would be fabulous at what I do, but procrastination and distraction are definitely a hazard. I mean, I should be working RIGHT NOW. *sigh* Happy Hour never comes fast enough for me.

Renee said...

I think your job sounds tough. Transcribing is tough at the best of times, never mind medical.

Love Renee xoxo

Hope said...

I have always wanted to be a transcriptionist. Is that even the right word?
Do you ever get upset about what you read in a doctor's letter? Like, someone is going to get terrible news and you feel sick for them?

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

@renee...Tough but fascinating most of the time. Family practice tended to be tedious. I kinda of felt bad for the poor doc after the millionth case of sniffles and sinusitis in a day. I could transcribe what he was going to say before he said it.

@hope...I have typed reports where I'm crying as I type. It is so weird to start a report and hear a new term and you type away and finally at some point you stop to look up your new term...and it is something awful. It is terminal and off they go to the oncologist or surgeon and endless MRIs and labs. I have a new client and will be doing ER work and I have a feeling that could be soggy going on some days. And sometimes it is flat our hilarious.

A good transcriptionist can find work, a good service is always on the look out because of all the new clients and hospitals they get. The learning curve is steep, though, and stops a lot of people...even if you do get to work in your PJs.

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