Sunday, September 27, 2009

This Tin Foil Hat is Squooshing My Brains

I was pondering my retirement account the other day.  *sigh* Is it only me or does anyone else feel like finding a Master-of-the-Universe, Wall Street-working, TARP-taking, Lamborghini-driving-lunkhead and commit some sort of homicide?  

My mom and dad are all worried about me since I am single again, so I was trying to make them feel better.  You know, sometimes bad ideas should really announce themselves better.  Opportunity knocks but bad ideas just invite themselves in and make themselves at home.

I love financial blogs.  I must be into S&M.  My favorite is Calculated Risk because the people who comment are hilarious and smart. Half the time I have no idea what they are talking about. I can read the words and I assume they have meaning because other people jump in and comment, but I'm not sure what it all means. 

For example:  "At September 30, 2008, all of the trust preferred CDO securities were still investment grade rated, were paying as agreed with no shortfall in principal or interest payments, and were determined not to involve other-than-temporary impairment ("OTTI"). During the fourth quarter of 2008, factors outside the Company's control impacted the fair value of these securities and will continue to do so, including but not limited to: guidance on fair value accounting, issuer credit deterioration, issuer deferral and default rates, potential failure or government seizure of underlying financial institutions, sksodhei49dkdks....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz."

At other times, they are hilarious and have the funniest links to YouTube videos. 

But the bottom line (get it, an accounting joke. Okay, shutting up now) is that the s*^t has yet to hit the fan as far as the commenters are concerned and unfortunately they have been right on so many things for years.  

So, I have been trying on my tin foil hat and wondering how I should prepare. Do you remember the story, "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie?" You invite the mouse in for a cookie, which is fairly insane, most rodents are quite good at finding your cookie supply on their own, and they will want a glass of milk?  I have a feeling if I start thinking about all hell breaking loose, I might get carried away. 

I figure a case of Jack Daniels, couple of cases of diet soda, maybe some cheese doodles, and I'm set. You know, the world ends on December 12, 2012 anyway? They made a movie about it and everything.

What do you think? Any ideas would be appreciated. Talk loudly tin foil hat blocks sound.


@eloh said...

Amid my getting poisoned and bathing of strangers this week...all I have written is soooo depressing and doomsday-ish....really, that last thing that I need is to find another one like me that buys 55 gal drums by the truck load and sits in the dark with a Mayan calendar wearing a tin foil kids will take my computer if they find out about you......QUICK hide here comes one...

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

Shoot. I was really counting on you to keep me company. I have an extra colander and everything. Dang kids. I am hiding behind my supply of toilet paper that will take me into the next decade so they won't find me.

Hope the poison has left your system...we want a blow by blow account of what has been going on.

Aunt Juicebox said...

Haha, ever since I wrote about my survivor gravy, I've been rethinking the whole mormon compound thing again. I mean, who says I can't line my walls with metal shelving and just stockpile whatever I want? I've given up caring whether or not people think I'm a whackjob.

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

Aunt Juicebox...You and me baby~! I figure if you do it the smart way, it can also be a hedge against inflation. Well, assuming there is inflation. There could be deflation. But then I hear farmers are having a heck of a time getting credit to do their thing, so food could get more expensive. *sigh* Like I said, I read too much sometimes. We can hunker down and connect our tin foil hats together; we can get better reception that way.

Sara said...

I've never heard of anyone being turned on by calculated risk, but hey, whatever works for you.

A good friend of mine gets all sorts of hot and bothered when her boyfriend talks to her about office supplies, like a Rolodex, briefcase or Blackberry. I don't get that one either.

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

Sara...well, I guess we will not be letting you into the tin foil hat club~! Just find a nice Mormon and maybe they will share.

And now I truly feel weird. I remember going back to school and loving to buy new supplies...paper, pens, notebooks, etc. I wouldn't say I get all turned on but it does make a happy place in my heart. Now, if you want to talk about getting all hot and bothered, muscle cars do it for me. It is amazing how much a product of your teen years you become~!